People are like plants–we need to grow or else we die. It’s a harsh but factual part of our lives. We feel like we’re constantly struggling with seemingly no growth in sight but it is precisely because you are struggling that you are indeed growing. When you go out and see a puddle or a pond, you’ll notice that the water is calm and unmoving. It may seem pretty serene however there’s a large chance that beneath the surface, germs and other bacteria are festering.
Basically that water is dead and other than bacteria and parasites, there’s little else that can grow there. Now visualize rivers and oceans–always in constant motion. These often large bodies of water can seem tumultuous and violent but beneath the surface teems so much life. If anything, this should teach us that just because something looks like it’s struggling doesn’t mean that there’s no progress or growth to be had. In fact, it’s the opposite. If you don’t struggle, you’re already dead.
Today, I want to talk about the various little ways that you may rob yourself of growth. It can be fairly easy to overlook the fact that you may be depriving yourself of growth opportunities.
Hiding behind “I’m busy”
Everyone is busy, in truth. Yet you may notice that other still get to to other things that you may be unable to find time for. Simple things like working out, learning to cook a new recipe, trying out a new food place, meeting up with friends or family–these things that you have passed on because you’re ‘too busy’. When you automatically think something can’t work because it doesn’t fit into your schedule, you’re denying yourself a chance to grow to experience things beyond your structured safe space.
Surrounding yourself with “yes” people
It’s pretty hard to see you’re covered in dirt if you don’t ever peer into a mirror. A mirror is exactly what other people with opinions that may differ from your own are. Mirrors are often unforgiving when it comes to our flaws but that gives us the opportunity to correct the flaw, or at least do something about it. When you surround yourself with people who only ever agree with you, you’re cutting off your opportunity for growth. Hearing dissenting opinions may not be pleasant sometimes but when you limit your sphere to ideas that all support your idea is ultimately more damaging to your health as a person.
Feeding your resentments and regrets
Everyone has baggage–it’s pretty hard not to. However, the biggest difference in some people is that instead of letting go and learning from the experience, they get stuck and continue to stew in the pain and the anger. When a new situation presents itself, instead of looking at it as a fresh start, those who feed their resentments and regrets often outright say no. They say no out of fear of a repeat of a previous experience. While our past experiences should give us some sort of basis for how we act or interact with future situations, it should not be the end all be all for everything. Every situation is different. Whether it be the persons involved or the time when its presented. Ultimately, the only similar variable in the equation is yourself. If you are the same person as you were when you first came across this, there’s a big chance that you’ll end up with the same result.
However, if you are no longer the same person–if you allowed yourself to grow by letting go of your resentment and anger, there’s a 1000% chance of a different ending.
So with that in mind, are you guilty of doing these little things? If you are, I dare say it’s time for a little change, don’t you think?